Armed

I wonder what would happen if I bought a gun. And had to use it to defend my property. I wonder…

And, honestly, I was raised around guns. My father even took me out hunting with him, one time, and I wouldn’t even shoot an already dead animal off of a fence post. So that tells you all you need to know about how I feel about killing things. Even things that are already dead.

My people have many rituals and spiritual practices around the killing of animals. Especially the buffalo. We used every single piece of the animal and we spent a great deal of time honoring the gifts the buffalo provided us. Before, during, and after the kill.

I say we, even before I learned the truth about my people because I have always felt the sadness of killing an animal for sport. I have always believed there was a need for deep reverence for what the animal sacrificed and therefore never felt right about killing them. I have never been a fan of the folks who would hang them in their homes without having some deep spiritual connection to having them.

I have mixed feelings around the use of animal hides today even. I recently attended a drum-making workshop led by an indigenous elder and I have been processing this experience ever since. I know the skins used were ethically sourced and I personally said many healing and loving things as I worked on the drum I was making. I feel deep gratitude today for now having personally made a drum and for learning the process. And I am not sure how I will proceed with this knowledge.

I do know that I will always feel very deeply about these things. I am not a fan of guns that are used to harm. The need to possess them feels alien to me.

I don’t want to argue the right to bear them. I would rather argue the right to be alive, to not have to fear going out to get my groceries or to see a movie.

Life is sacred. We are sacred beings. I wish more folks could be connected to that belief.